Today is Dahlia’s 1st Birthday! So we had a mini party, well not really, it was just her daddy, brothers and me signing her happy birthday and letting her eat a cup cake for the first time. Truth be told she didn't even like the cup cake, she just made a big mess. But it's her birthday and she gets to do whatever she wants today :). It's better she makes a mess in an old onesie and not on her birthday outfit this Saturday.
I also wanted to take this time to write Dahlia a letter (hopefully I can do this yearly) and keep them for her to read when she is older:
As I dressed you this morning, the day of your birthday, I couldn't help but think about our journey with you this past year. Exactly a year ago we saw you for the first time, it was such an intense day, I was full of emotions, but mostly I was scared and nervous as if it was my first time giving birth. I actually think I was more scared than with Damien and Daren because you were the first to have gone full term. I was worried about how the birth would be with a full grown baby. But after 8 hours of labor, the sight of you relieved all my worries, and all I saw was a beautiful baby girl with a head full of hair. As soon as you came out I immediately got to hold you, something I didn’t get to do with your brothers so that’s a moment I can't never forget. You were still slimy as I held you when the nurse wiped your eyes and you opened them and looked at me for the first time. Your face and the way you looked back at me, still makes me feel all warm inside. Your daddy looked so happy too and he couldn’t stop saying how beautiful you were.
You brought light into my life, at a time when things weren’t so bright. I never imagined having a baby girl, I didn’t even know what to expect. I remember thinking what was I going to do with a girl! After having two boys it felt like I had to start over, I felt clueless. But as the months have gone by and all your first time milestones have happened we've all been here for you, cheering you on and getting excited for every little thing you do. It’s funny how even your brothers have waited in anticipation for you to smile, say your first word, crawl, walk and eat food for the first time. They are the best brothers a girl can ask for and am so proud of my boys for how they've treated you and loved you. But am sure you know that, you are specially attached to Damien. Every morning you call for him from your crib so he can come and get you. You said his name before mine! Actually you said the names of all three men in your life first: Daddy, Dami (Damien) & Daren (who you call Dah only). Mama has been a recently said word you learn and I still get so excited each time I hear you say it.
You are the epitome of me, but with looks of your daddy. Such a beautiful being, fun, outgoing, smart, talented and with magical powers because even on my lowest days seeing you smile changes my mood. You’ve changed my life forever, I never in a million years would have thought I would be writing to my own daughter. Me, mommy to two amazing little boys, is also mommy to a girl now. Making stuff for you, girly things! And having pink everywhere still amazes people who know me on a personal level. But you’ve made me see life in a whole other perspective and hopefully I am able to help you grow into a young women that’s honorable, respectful, giving and caring. I can only wish for the best for you, I love you a ton.